Waiting involves restraint, patience, longsuffering: the more significant the hoped-for event, the more discipline is involved, the more profound the preparation. Such has been my experience since the November 2019 admission to hospice. Happily, I was moved to drop seeds along this circuitous path as I went. Back then, I thought my transition was near, that I would experience the Cosmic Christ, but not so.

Daily blogs record my new learning of the end-time, stretching indefinitely ahead. Never did I imagine ordering a 2021 wall calendar for my kitchen, setting up my Christmas tree on the porch, or taking short walks in the sunshine with my helper. True, my weakness and shortness of breath continue, but only to remind me of the limits of my eighty-five year old body. Now, that’s old!

But a far more important waiting is occurring than mine. Since the fifth century AD, Christian churches have been observing the liturgical season of Advent, from the Latin word adventus meaning coming, in preparation for the birth of Jesus. Through decades of study and prayer of the Jesus mysteries, my preparations first focused upon the Bethlehem manger, then, upon the presence of Jesus in my heart, and in later years, upon the Cosmic Christ, available to us all.

This passage from the letter of James speaks to this process:

Be patient, then, brothers and sisters, until the Lord’s coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop, patiently waiting for the autumn and spring rains.

Only when fully mature will the Christmas harvest occur.